Inga M. Beck

Sometimes you find songs that really speak to you as a human being. Songs that help you when you are insecure, sad, angry or just plain old bored. These songs are not always very easy to find, and most often you’re not really looking for them. They find you. I tend to run into these sometimes and there have been a few that have spoken to my very core when I needed it most.

To name some examples there’s “I think of angels” by KK which I listened to a lot first after my brother died. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AGqt4Om66NY There’s Imogen Heap’s “Hide and Seek”. And it’s not all just songs, there’s a beautiful video poem by Andrea Dorfman and Tanya Davis called “How to be Alone” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k7X7sZzSXYs For more lovey moods there’s “Friday I’m in Love” with The Cure and Tim Minchin’s “You Grew On Me” (yes, really) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=frNpdG4F9mw Angrier stuff contains songs like System of a Down’s “Psycho” and “Hel” by Skálmöld http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RVNmQ4Ts8D4 and for the crazy times there’s things like “They’re coming to take me away” with Napoleon XIV and Oldelafs “Le Café” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UGtKGX8B9hU And the list goes ooon and oooon.

But now I have a song that I don’t think will ever stop being true to me. I can listen to it in any state of mind and it can always bring my spirit up. This is Amanda Palmer’s “In My mind”.

I think most of us, when growing up and onwards have some sort of idea of what kind of person we want to be. What we want from our life and we have this notion that some day we will have it all together and just know that we have accomplished all that needs to be accomplished etc.

Well, for most of us things don’t turn out that way. I admit I am only twenty-five so I may be saying this too early, but I am in no way how I thought I’d be at age 25, and I’m glad I’m not. But sometimes I forget and I get depressed that all my hopes, dreams and ambitions are still so very far away. I’m disappointed in myself that I do not devote all the time I have to better myself and move closer to my goal and it brings me down to where I can’t get anything done at all.

That’s where this song comes in. I don’t remember at what point I first heard it, but I know it was like having a bucket of cold water splashed in my face. It woke me up.

Of course I would love to be the fabulous Amanda Palmer (she’s married to Neil Gaiman for crying out loud!!). But I know I’ll be much happier just being myself… and who knows, maybe I’ll find my own brilliant silly person with fabulous hair one day.

And here it is, with Amanda Palmer herself

(she has an official video but I heard it first in this version and I prefer it that way… plus they’re just so adorable together)

“Fuck yes
I am exactly the person that I want to be”